Another NEW SCRIPT!

So I just went through the last script that I posted and fixed a few of the grammatical errors. After taking a few suggestions from people, I also fixed a bit of the beginning. Instead of Jack complaining to Lindsey about how his table asked him twice about the happy hour, I actually show Jack back at the table where his table asks him about it again! We are able to see a little bit more interaction and realize how indecisive a lot of customers can be!

Hope you guys enjoy this. As far as I know this is my closet final draft. Please let me know what you think!
Eat Now, Pay Waiter

NEW SCRIPT!!!

So sorry that I have been neglecting my updates lately!!!  But here is my latest script for you all to read. It has come a long way and there are definitely some changes. Let me know what you think!!!

Eat Now, Pay Waiter

Here is latest script re-write. It is much different than the first one, but it does still need some work. I am going to change up Lindsey’s story a bit and I need to develop an ending. Hope you like the changes I have made so far!

Revised Script

Keep in mind, the ending does sound a little bit like a preachy message and I working to fix this 🙂

Index Cards Rough

After reviewing my index cards, I was able to better write my script. Keep in mind that it is very rough….I will be making multiple changes.

INT. Restaurant. Night
A group of employees are all getting off of work at the same time on a Friday night and decide to sit together and order some food and have a few drinks.
SARAH
(Coming around the corner out of the kitchen)
Do you know where he went? Did he just leave?

LINDSEY
(Walking out of the kitchen behind Sarah)
I don’t know. All I know is that he was not happy. He just stormed out of here.
CHRIS
Yeah man. I have definitely never seen anything like that happen before. You guys wanna grab something to eat? I am gonna get a drink.
SARAH
(In unison with Lindsey)
Yeah, let’s eat. I am so hungry.
LINDSEY
I am so hungry I could eat a cow!
Scene ends with Lindsey and Sarah standing around the computer trying to figure out what to order, while Bill and Chris are headed towards the bar.
INT. round table. night
All four employees are sitting around the table with their drinks and are waiting for their food to come up in the kitchen. Everyone is having a good time and we come in in the middle of their conversation.
CHRIS
Man I can’t believe Jack just up and walked out of the restaurant tonight. You know how many times I have wanted to do that? I am a little bit proud of him.
BILL
Does anybody even really know what happened?
LINDSEY
I mean, I am not sure. All anyone has really heard is that he and his customers got so frustrated with each other, that Jack just up and quit the restaurant during his shift. Without so much as a word, he walked out. Nobody here has ever done that before.
Bret is now off of work and walks up to the table with a round of happy hour beers and takes a seat next to Chris.
SARAH
Gosh, I mean I remember a time that I had this table that had me so frustrated. There was a young family in my section and I had just delivered their food and had gone back to check on them…..
As Sarah begins her story, the camera fades out to a reenactment of the incident as it is happening.
INT. restaurant. day
Sarah has a young family sitting at table 13 and she has just dropped of their food. It is late Saturday afternoon and she goes back to the table a few minutes later to make sure that the food is tasting all right.
SARAH
How is everything tasting here?
Female Customer
(Mother in her late 30’s)
Everything is pretty good, but my son really did not like his pizza. The crust was really hard.
SARAH
(Surprised)
Oh, okay. I am sorry about that. We can definitely get him another meal if you would like.
As the woman hands the plate to Sarah, she sees that the little boy has eaten the entire cheese pizza except for the crust. She is surprised that the mother said he did not like when the entire thing is practically gone!
FEMALE CUSTOMER
That would be great. He’ll just have the mac ‘n cheese.
SARAH
No problem. I’ll be right back with that for you.
As sarah gets to the computer station she camera gets in real close, almost documentary style as she vents her frustrations to her co-workers.
Frustrated as she is walking away, Sarah gets back to the computer with the cheese pizza and starts to vent to Chris about what has just happened.
SARAH
Does this look like a cheese pizza that someone did not like?
CHRIS
Uh, no. Why?
SARAH
This mom at table 13 told me that her kid did not like his pizza and now she wants to order him mac ‘n cheese. He ate the entire pizza! It sure looks like he “liked” the pizza to me! It’s so annoying. You know the mom just wanted a free meal!
After Sarah is done complaining and rings in the order for the mac ‘n cheese, we come back to the group sitting around the table.
BILL
Wow. I can’t believe that. People really do that?
LINDSEY
Oh yeah. I have had it happen quite a bit. You just wanna look at the table and say, “Really?”
SARAH
Yeah. It was pretty irritating.
CHRIS
All right. I am gonna go check on the food.
While Chris is in the kitchen grabbing food, Sarah has gotten up to go to the bar to get a drink. Bret starts in with a terrible experience that he had working in the bar a few weeks ago.
BRET
Did you guys hear about what happened to me in the bar with that boys basketball team?
LINDSEY
Oh my gosh! This is a good story. I remember that day. Those people were the worst!
BRET
Yeah, so it was a Sunday afternoon a few weeks ago and this large group of people just pour into the bar. Turns out it was a boys basketball team and there was a tournament going on that weekend. The restaurant was fairly busy which left no room for 20-25 people, so they came into the bar. I maybe had three customers sitting at the bar top, so a party wasn’t too big a deal. Little did I know, they were trouble before they even sat, once they sat down.
As Bret continues his story, the camera fades as the reenactment begins.
INT. Bar. Afternoon.
Bret is at the computer behind the bar top when suddenly the bar is flooded with a large group of young boys and their parents. Thinking that these people were going to push a few tables together and sit down, he watched as they spread out over the entire bar.
LINDSEY
(Walks into the bar from the kitchen and is observing what is going on)

CHRIS
(Is usually a server, but was hosting this day. He walks into the bar from the host stand over to where Lindsey is standing)

LINDSEY
What is going on? These people are sitting all over the place.
CHRIS
I know. I tried to tell them that we could push some tables together for them in the bar and they said they would figure it out.
LINDSEY
This is just chaos. They are all over the bar.
BRET
(Walks over to Chris to ask him what the heck is going)
Dude, they are sitting all over the place. The husbands are at the bartop, the women are a table all by themselves, and now the kids are spread out all over the place. This is ridiculous they think they can just take over the bar!
Bret gives Chris and Lindsey a big sigh and quickly moves back behind the bar to get going on taking drink orders. Lindsey and Sarah try to get into the bar and help take drink orders for the boys. There is one mom that has taken over the reigns to be the head of the operation. After Lindsey and Sarah help with drinks as much as they can, they take a step back and just watch the chaos continue to unfold.
The head mom comes over to Lindsey and Sarah and gives them a piece of her mind.
HEAD MOM
Excuse me girls, is there anyway you guys can divide and conquer and help take some food orders here?
LINDSEY
No, we really can’t help. Bret is your server in here and since you all want separate checks he has to be the one to put in the orders.
HEAD MOM
He is the only one in here? Neither of you two are serving in the bar?
SARAH
No, we are actually working in the restaurant part and just came in here to help Bret out.
Head mom
Well you guys aren’t moving at the pace that we need you to, so it would be great to have you all just split up and start taking orders.
LINDSEY
(Taken aback and not knowing what to say)
Um, yeah okay.
The head mom walks away and Lindsey and Sarah are dumbfounded as they walk together into the kitchen. They come out carrying trays of food that they are helping drop off to another one of Bret’s tables. While Bret is in the kitchen for a quick minute, Lindsey and Sarah tell him and the kitchen manager the conversation they had just had with the Head Mom. Both Bret and the kitchen manager tell them not to take orders. Bret will get it done the way that he needs to and they will have to wait.
Lindsey and sarah are now at the front of the house at the host stand talking to chris about this unbelieveable party
CHRIS
Wow. I am glad I wasn’t serving in the bar with Bret. I would have let all of those people sit there just as long and found something else to do to keep me busy and make them wait.
SARAH
You didn’t call ahead. You want separate checks. You aren’t sitting together and you expect fast service. None of which you get when you just waltz into a restaurant with a big party unannounced. Go to freakin’ Culver’s then!
As this part of the scene fades, we are now back at the round table and chris and sarah are back as well.
Everyone is in shock and are all sort of talking at the same time. Chris gets up yet again to go to the bathroom. As soon as he is gone, Bill and Lindsey start to make fun of him a bit.
BILL
Gosh, Chris seriously cannot sit down. I mean why is he even eating with us at all?
LINDSEY
I know. He doesn’t even care about what are talking about, but he always wants us to listen when he has something to say.
The talk about Chris ends immediately as Bret spots him coming back out of the bathroom. In order to make it look like they were not talking about Chris, all of the co-workers quickly change the topic of the conversation to something else.
Chris walks back to the table and hears Lindsey talking about how annoying it is to have a table ask for the check and the they continue to sit there and chat without paying.
LINDSEY
I can’t stand it when people are done with their meal, they ask for the bill, and then they let it sit there. Or, even better, when a server runs a credit card for a table and then they take forever to sign the bill.
CHRIS
Oh man. I know. People just don’t realize that servers cannot leave the restaurant until we have turned in all of our customer reciepts.
After this conversation comes to an end, it triggers another memory for Lindsey about when she first started serving.
LINDSEY
Speaking of running people’s credit cards for them, did I ever tell you guys what happened to me when I first started serving?
Bret
I don’t think so. Wait, didn’t it have something to do with you being pregnant?
SARAH
(Surprised)
What?!?! Lindsey, I am your best friend and you never told me you were pregnant? You weren’t pregnant!
LINDSEY
No, you guys listen! I was never pregnant! I’ll tell you what happened
The story now transitions into a reenactment of Lindsey’s experience with a couple where the woman told her she was pregnant.
INT. RESTAURANT. NIGHT
It is a busy Friday night and Lindsey is going around bussing some plates off of a few of her tables, when booth 32, that has an older middle-aged couple sitting there asks her a question right as she is about to run their credit card for them.
WOMAN
Miss?
LINDSEY
(Walking over to her table)
Yes?
WOMAN
Pick a number.
LINDSEY
A number? What do you mean?
WOMAN
Just pick a number. 4 or 5?
LINDSEY
4 or 5 what?
WOMAN
4 or 5 months pregnant?
LINDSEY
(Very confused)
Pregnant? I am not pregnant.
WOMAN
(Joking, yet assertive manner)
Yes you are. You have to be what, at least 4 months?
LINDSEY
(Feeling very annoyed but trying not to act like it, she looks at this woman’s husband and his mouth is on the table)
Nope, I am definitely not pregnant.
LINDSEY
(Her voice trails off, awkwardly not knowing what say)
Okay, well I’ll just run this card here for you and I’ll be right back.
Lindsey heads to the computer to run their credit card and cannot believe what just happened.
LINDSEY
Bill! My people at table 32 just asked me if i was pregnant. Actually she was basically insisting that I am pregnant.
BILL
What? You are not serious? I mean, you are not super skinny by any means but you definitely don’t look pregnant.
LINDSEY
(Astounded by Bill’s response)
Um, thanks Bill. Not exactly what I wanted to hear.
Lindsey walks away and heads back to the table to return the check to her customers. Not really knowing what to expect she sets the check down.
WOMAN
You know, the only reason I thought you were pregnant is because I used to be a server, and when I was pregnant, I wore my apron down lower, a lot like how you are wearing your.
LINDSEY
(As she is standing there listening, she is just wanting nothing more than to walk away and forget this ever happened.)

WOMAN
You look small from behind, but when you turned around…
LINDSEY
(Politely cutting her off)
No, I am not pregnant….okay, well thanks you guys. Have a good night
We are now back at the round table and everyone is going crazy!
CHRIS
No way! Oh my gosh. I cannot believe the nerve of some people. They just go out to eat and think that they can say whatever they want!
BRET
I mean that is amazing! You, by no means look pregnant! I cannot believe that.
For the past few minutes Bill has had his head buried in his cell phone.
BILL
Jack is coming back in tonight you guys!
EVERYONE AT THE TABLE
(Whispers, talking etc)

SARAH
(Sounding interested but a little annoyed at the same time)
He is coming back in? Where did he even go?
LINDSEY
I mean, I am surprised he is even thinking about setting foot back in here after what happened.
CHRIS
I cannot wait to hear from him about what happened. I wanna shake that man’s hand. He is a god in my book right now.
As Chris is saying this, Sarah is sort of rolling her eyes. Some others are looking around not really knowing how to handle the situation. As the table begins to grow quiet, you can tell that some servers are starting to get a bit tired. Drinks are almost empty, but everyone is staying around waiting for Jack. As he walks back into the restaurant to join the group, he is comforted by some, while others are silently snubbing him. Jack sits down at the table nonchalantly, not acting like much as happened.
BILL
So dude, tell us what happened? Everyone cannot stop talking about your performance tonight.
JACK
(Nervously but moreso nonchalant)
Well, everything with table 12 was going fine. I was cracking jokes, making them laugh and just having a good time. I went to take their order, and of course I didn’t write it down becuase I didn’t need to. They asked me a few times about what the Happy Hour special was, and I gladly repeated it to them, although I was slightly annoyed because I had already given them this information 2 times. The next thing that annoyed me was that this table told me that they were ready to order when in fact they were not.
As the story continues we cut to jack serving this table.
They were still looking through their menus and each person at the table kept telling the other person to go.
JACK
(Looking irritated like he had other places to be because they were wasting his time.)
I can give you all a few more minutes and then come back.
DAD
No, it’s okay. We are ready.
JACK
(Voiceover or inner monologue)
These people are not my only table. Seriously, make up your freakin’ mind!

About 16 minutes later, after I put in their order, it was time for me to start bringing the food out to the table. A young little punk at the table asked me for some honey mustard.
JACK
Sure thing. I’ll be right back.
Jack walks back to the computer and Sarah is there typing in an order, so he tells her what’s going on.
JACK
My table is getting on my nerves. This little kid asked me for mustard for his chicken fingers. I have some other things to do first and that little punk is gonna have to wait.
Sarah just stares at him without saying a word. She is not impressed. Jack comes back to the table with a ramekin of honey mustard and the boy is practically done with his chicken fingers and actually already had honey mustard at the table.
MOM
We didn’t know where you had gone. You were gone for a really long time so we asked another server who was able to bring it to them right away.

Jack could sense the annoiance in her voice and did not like that she was calling him a slow server. He thinks that he is one of, if not the best server at this restaurant. Those people were crazy.
DAD
Can I get a refill on my coke?
JACK
(Tired of having to run yet again for this table)
Sure thing.
DAD
(Took a sip right away and made a face of disgust)
I think this is Diet Coke and I asked for just regular Coke.
JACK
No, it’s regular sir. I am positive.
DAD
I know for a fact this is Diet. I can tell. I just took a sip. I think you made a mistake.
Without saying another word, Jack went to get him another new one. After that the daughter at the table said her soup was too hot and the mother asked him to take it back and get her something a little cooler.
mom
Excuse me. I don’t mean to keep you running, but my daughter says her soup is too hot. Is there anyway you can cool it down a bit?
JACK
(Not knowing how to answer)
A little cooler? I don’t really know how I can cool the soup down other than to just let it sit out for a few minutes.
MOM
Well this soup is too hot. We don’t really have time to sit and wait for it to cool down. We need something that she can eat right away.
Once this table finally had me back at their assistance they were not going to let me go. Once I got back and tried to hand the table their daughter’s soup, I ended up knocking over the dad’s coke, which I actually did on purpose.
CHRIS
(Busts out laughing. He is eating this up.)

SARAH
(Rolls her eyes and cannot believe this story)

JACK
(Trying to hold back a smile)
I am so sorry. Let me get you guys a few towels.

Of course I came backa with towels only after letting them sit there for a minute. I walked back to the table and tried to crack a few jokes but it didn’t seem like the they was eating up any of it.
JACK
I am so sorry again. Really, would you care for a dessert on the house tonight?
Mom
(Stuck up)
Yes, that would actually be really nice. we’ll take a creme brulee.
JACK
Unfortunately, we are out of creme brulees.
The parents at the table roll their eyes. They have had enough.
DAD
You know what? This is ridiculous. After the service you have given us tonight, it really doesn’t surprise me that you are “out of” creme brulee.
JACK
Well I actually thought that the service I gave you was pretty good considering what they put him through. It’s not every day I get customers like you in my section.
We come back to the round table for a second to get the reactions of the other workers.
LINDSEY
Oh man. I can’t believe you said that! As bad as that was, customers know that they can whatever they want to their server and it will get them whatever they want.
Bret
Yeah, and I’m betting they were shocked and not expecting you to actually respond negatively.
back to the reenactment
Mom
(Floored)
We need to speak to a manager!
JACK
Why? Just so you can try and get your whole meal for free because you’re cheap? Is this what you do everytime you come out to eat? You know what? I am done.
Jack then walks out of the restaurant in the middle of dinner rush without a word. He doesn’t even walk out the front door. He walks out the patio door which isn’t even open in the winter.
As the story comes to an end, we are brought back to reality with the voice of the general manager asking to speak to Jack in the office.
BILL
Man, I just don’t know. I mean, what Jack did is completely wrong, but at the same time, those people he had to serve were a bit ridiculous you know?
Some time passes by and Jack comes out of the kitchen and back to the table.
CHRIS
What happened dude? Do I still get to work with you or what?
JACK
Yeah, I am not fired, and I am coming back to work here, but am suspended for a week.
SARAH
(Without saying much at all throughout the entire conversation she gets up first to signal an end to the night.)

On that note, the group starts to get up and everyone says they’ll see each other tomorrow, ready for another day of putting up with weird customers.

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